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February 8, 2020

Let Them Help You Like You Want to Help Them

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Let Them Help You Like You Want to Help Them

This week was a rough one.

I have a lingering cold that is draining my energy. I had a busy week at work with a few big deadlines. My husband was traveling all week. My mother-in-law who often steps in to help was out of town. My kids were ridiculously whiny. Plus I had a few errands that I absolutely had to run after work.  It was a mess.

However, one of my dear friends asked if she could watch the kids so I could go run my errands in peace (and more efficiently sans two small children).  My initial reaction was how kind that was of her but I didn’t want to inconvenience her. She has two kids of her own and is also a busy working mom.  So I    politely declined her generous offer.

Yet, the week went on and I HAD to go to baseball signups. I either TODAY went or my kid doesn’t get to play baseball.   But… it was freezing and snowing and my kids were being so challenging. Nothing sounded worse than taking them to stand in line for an hour (potentially more). At this point, I  would have rather had a root canal.

So on a whim, I  took my friend up on her offer.  I dropped my kids off to play with their friends and I  got to stand in line at baseball signups quietly with a warm cup of coffee and Instagram in hand.  It was about as blissful as standing in an hour long line could be.

Afterwards I  went to pick up my kids and you know what?  Their mood and significantly improved.  They were happy and enjoying the time with their friends. They had behaved like angels all night.   My friend, she was really excited about having the opportunity to help me.   We sat for a few minutes catching up and enjoying each others company.  The kids and I headed home for a relatively easy bedtime.

It was a great night.

And one that we wouldn’t have experienced had I not taken my friend up on her offer to help me .

See, as moms we tend to think that we need to do everything on our own.  If we ask for help, we are failing.  But we CAN’T do it on our own. We are not supposed to do it on our own. Nowhere else in the world are moms expected to take on what we take on with as little support that we have.  This is designed to be a team sport. It takes a village to raise kids into responsible and kind adults.

That is why we NEED to ask for help.    And in doing so, that doesn’t make up weak. That makes us ALL stronger.   That makes us moms a community.  A community of badass women trying to raise our kids to be strong and support each other.

So to raise children to be strong and support each other, we must support each other now, and allow others to support us.

The beauty of this moment for me is that it made me realize that by allowing that mom to help me out when I needed help, I was not only helping myself but I  was helping her.   She WANTED to help me but I    had never given her the opportunity to do so.

I was not letting her help me the way that I wanted to help her.

I was not enabling the community that I hope my daughter one day has.

So moms, ask for help and let others help you.

It’s together that we are stronger now and for future generations.   <3

 

How have you helped other moms?  Have you accepted help from others? Leave a comment below!

 

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